The Delivery!!! Katherine Jane Wilcox is Here!

You know.....it didn't really go so well. I had a
pretty hard time.

I had an awesome labor. They started me on the cream
at 10:35 pm on Monday night. It didn't really cause
any discomfort. Ty and I slept on and off that night.
They gave me an Ambien to help....which did some but
the anxiety of things to come and the bladder that was
completely compressed interfered. ha ha

Then they came in at 7:30 am and started the pitocin
drip. I did okay with it for a little bit...around 10
am I was starting to get pretty hard contractions. I
was starting to struggle and get to the point that I
didn't know how much more I wanted to take....so I
started talking about the epidural. The last one I
really remember brought tears to mine and Ty's eyes.
So Iasked....and they said no problem and got the
doctor in right away. The epidural worked right away.
I loved it!

I began to really progress. I started the morning at
a 2 which is where I had been for 2 weeks. My water
broke on its own at about 10:30 and I jumped to a 4-5.
I then jumped again to a 7 by 1:30. The nurse
thought I was doing great and predicted that I would
be fully dialated by 3:00 pm and ready to push. She
was calling me her "star patient"! Well....she was
right! Right on time I was ready to go. They told me
that we would start practice pushing. We started and
pushed with 2 contractions. I was having trouble
telling if I was doing anything or not. About that
time my doctor was called over to another room. Bless
her heart she had 4 patients in labor close in the
pushing phase...and one that ended up in an emergency
c-section. So....since I was having trouble feeling
my pushes....they decided to turn down my epidural
down and let me regain some of my feeling to be more
effective with my pushing.

We feel this was a bit of a mistake because we were
geared up and ready to go. My sister Courtney had
decided that she would stay in the room. She had my
lipstick ready to go b/c I was planning on looking
pretty good right after delivery! HA! And I really
thought since things were going so easily so far...I
would be fine with mom and Court in there. Well....so
they get me going again around 4:30 or so. This time
I was definitely more involved. I was able to feel
each contraction coming on.....but the contractions
had slowed down a little.....so my doctor had them
turn the pitocin back up to increase the pace and
intensity of my contractions! Remeber that they had
turned the epidural down......YUCK!

I pushed for probably an hour to an hour and a half.
Sometime during that my dad got there.....he came in
the room too. I was starting to get frustrating and
thinking this baby may never come out. I have so many
friends who pused for 45 min-1 hour and I really
wasn't getting very close. My doctor was telling me
that the baby was in the OP position and slightly
turned into my left side. Not the easiest position to
push a baby out. And they said that they baby had a
big head on her.....

I developed a fever so they brought in some Tylenol to
try to break it and then put me on an antibiotic drip.
The fever didn't help me to deal with this long phase
of delivery. I wasn't feeling well....on top of not
feeling well! Torture! My doctor began to talk about
other ways of pushing.....such as on my side....and
"going water skiing"....and I even heard her use the
words "forceps". I looked at Ty and told him I did
not want that.....and he told Dr. Nokleber that I did
not want that. By this point...I was in
tears...completely exhausted and just wanted the baby
out. I didn't want to do this anymore...I just wanted
to go home...

They asked me if I was thinking about having my family
leave....and I said that I think it would probably be
a good idea. I felt like I was letting them down. My
mom had always had such .....as she refers to
them...as easy labor and deliveries....and even Jenni
pushed for 45 minutes. I think I was set up a little
bit since I had done so well all day....and been
hearing a lot of good stories recently......I was just
not expecting to have so much trouble.

Once my family left....things got more intense. I was
just done...and really feeling each contraction. They
brought out a mirror so that they could encourage me
by showing me how much progress I was making. When I
first saw....it was such a tiny little bit of her
head. I could see that she had hair which was
funny....but it was pretty discouraging to me that
that was all the prgress I had made. We worked really
hard in the "water skiing" position. My doctor used a
hospital gown to make a handle on my end and with each
push I would push and she would pull against me at the
end of the table as hard as she could. And let me
just tell you that this 110 lb. lady is sooooo strong.
At one point, I said "I can't" and she said "yes you
can Natalie"....and I said "No, I literlly can't hang
on anymore you are pulling too hard". ha ha

I continued to push like that....and then the
conventional way I guess. She was just stuck and
couldn't get under my pelvic bone. Around 6:40 Dr.
Nockleberg said "I need you to really focus and give
me until 7 pm. I was soooooo done. And I was getting
mad at this point. Sweet Ty....oh my gosh.....he was
by my side the entire side! He did soooo good! I was
so worried that he would pass out.....he says he had
such an out of body experience that day. He was
strong for me....b/c I didn't feel strong anymore at
all. He just kept telling me I was doing so good. I
finally was making progress and could see more and
more of the baby's head. But it was really hurting at
this point. I don't know what happened......but I
could really feel the head crowning and I was also
feeling each contraction really strong in my low
tummy. Ouch....and It hurts.....I can hear myself
saying that. I swear Ty and I were tramatized by this
whole thing.....I told my doctor the next day that I
thought I had "post-traumatic stress syndrome". No
joke....

Finally.....what I thought would never end was getting
close....my eyes were closed so much of the time that
I didn't even know the "infantry" had come in. They
were getting the baby's stuff ready....my doctor was
putting on her boots, etc....there was some lady
behind me that was pushing me up each time I pushed.
I didn't know where all these people came from.
Finally, her head came out....and I felt so much
better. Then they said one more good push and it will
be over. Sure enough......she was out. I really
couldn't believe how instant the pain was gone. But I
was mad.....I was upset about the whole thing....I
felt like I had just been through a torture chamber.

They laid the baby on my chest and I just could
believe what I saw. They took her away to get her
cleaned up and checked across the room. Ty and I just
fell into each other. We were so emotional. We
honestly were more into each other than the baby at
that point because of how difficult that was. He just
kept saying that he was so sorry....so sorry.......we
were distraught. But looking back on it....it is a
moment that I will never forget the rest of my life.
He just held me and calmed me down. I tried to assure
him that I really was okay. I felt so much better.
But we just needed time to be together and let it out.
It was the most intense experience of our life. He
was amazing. I can't even imagine how hard it would
be to see someone in that kind of pain and really not
be able to do much to help. I can't imagine what alll
he saw....I didn't see much....but I know he did. I
didn't even know that I had to have an episotomy. I
was upset when I found out about it....but I didn't
even know until after. And I think I would have told
them to do anything at all to get her out a few
minutes before that.

Dr. Nokleberg assured me that a lot of first time
mommies have to push for about 2 hours.....I just had
to push for over 3 hours. And I couldn't believe it.
She also made me feel better when she told me the most
beautiful thing about my delivery was that the baby
did so beautifully. Her heart rate stayed about the
same the whole time. Her poor little head had a bit
of a cone off to the side where she was stuck for so
long. But it is already gone. It really wasn't that
bad after delivery but you could see if.

They allowed us a long time to stay in the room with
our family. Ty's mom and Melissa had made it there
prob by about 6:00 or so...so they had plenty of time
to get there. The baby was passed all around the
room. All the nurses and doctors said...they had
never seen a baby look so much like her daddy as this
one! Ha! We have even seen her little dimples! Her
bigger one is on her left cheek just like Ty! Her
eyes....I can look at either of them and just see both
of them.

They took the baby upstairs to get cleaned up. They
had me try to get up and go to the bathroom. By the
time we made it over there....I ended up sitting on
the toilet with my head on the handy-cap bar with my
ears ringing about to pass out. So back in bed I
went. For about another hour. I missed the baby
getting clearned up....but I did not feel good. So it
was good to be taken care of down stairs.

It was wild. Not what I expected. Sweet Ty said we
don't ever have to do that again. I told him that I
guess my lifelong fear of childbrith wasn't so crazy
after all. He agreed! He said he has never seen
anyone do something so hard in his whole life. We
couldn't talk about it without crying for the first
couple of days...but we are much better now. I even
find myself feeling a bit said that it is all
over....which makes no sense coming from someone who
was soooooo over being pregnant and wanting to be done
with it all. Hormones are crazy....I had a hard time
when Ty would touch my tummy. He was always so sweet
about touching and kissing my tummy and so the first
time he did that after she was gone it broke my heart.
I know all you moms out there are probably reaching
for the kleenex....it doesn't make sense to me....but
I am sure you understand. The first time that I
realized I didn't feel her move anymore was teary too.
So bazarre....her kicks were often hurtful and I felt
so swished, but then it was gone. It was such an
incredible experience and despite all the pain and
fear.....it is something that should be experienced.
I wish it wouldn't have been as difficult as it was.
I will be just as scared to do it again.
UNFORTUNATELY.....I was so ready to say, "It wasn't
that bad"....but I can't say that.

Ty said that after being home a few days with
Kate....that he now knows why some people have so many
babies. He also broke my heart when he saw a good
friend of ours who has a 8 month old and he saw how
big she was.....he doesn't want his little Kate to
grow up. I have always loved little babies but he
always thought kids were more fun when you can play
with them. The other night she was laying on his
chest and looking up at him.....he says he will never
forget that look. He just can't get over how cute she
is! So tiny and sweet. She has however been keeping
us up every night since we came home. She thinks the
2 am - 6 am window is time to eat like a mad-woman and
CRY! Not fun.....but then she is so great during the
day. We hope that we can get a hang on that situation
soon....b/c daddy goes back to work on Wednesday so we
need to get a little more rest at night.

I am recovering pretty well. And feeling better with
each day. My soreness seems to be a little slow in
going away but I think that is normal. Nursing is
going pretty good. She loves to eat! Again...more
pain for mom but she is doing good with it. I looked
like I had a botch boob job the other day and had to
break out the pump to get things under control.

She is a doll and I am really trying to love this
phase and I know it will pass so quickly. As hard as
it is to learn what all her cries mean...and for us to
figure things out....we are doing good. Again, Ty has
been great. He has changed almost every diaper! He
brings her to me....whatever I need.

Our moms and my sisters were here on and off and were
a HUGE help! My mom is still here and will be here
for the rest of the week. I am so thankful! And so
lucky! She is wonderful with the baby...and even more
so with her baby....me! I could never repay her for
all the help she has given us over the past 10 months!


Well, that is my story. It was crazy and wild....and
painful and emotionally disturbing....but we survived.
And we are all okay!